You do not have to complete a lesson before seeking help. An unwanted image, repeated intentional use, a threat and abuse need different responses, and they can overlap. Begin with safety and the person who needs care. You do not need to diagnose a condition, investigate an offender or collect sexual material.
If somebody is in danger now
Seek urgent human assistance through an appropriate local emergency service and a safe adult. In South Africa, government guidance lists 10111 for police emergencies. Childline lists 116 as its free, twenty-four-hour child-protection helpline. These are published details, not a guarantee that a call will connect. If one route fails, try another suitable safe adult or service. Outside South Africa, use verified local services.
A helpline conversation does not replace an applicable duty to report to the appropriate authority. Do not wait for a church meeting, a complete account or permission from the person alleged to have caused harm before obtaining protection.
If you are a young person seeking help
You can begin with a short sentence: “Something has happened online and I need help.” You do not have to show or describe sexual material. Tell a safe adult you can contact. If a parent or caregiver is unsafe, dismissive or involved in the harm, choose another trustworthy adult or appropriate professional service. If speaking is difficult, use a private note or another accessible way to communicate.
Being threatened, deceived or abused is not your fault. If you have also made a wrong choice, help is still available. A previous reply, payment or picture does not give somebody permission to exploit you. You do not have to handle a threat alone to prove maturity or faith.
If a child tells you
Stop other activity and listen. Say, “Thank you for telling me. I am glad you came for help.” Where harm is involved, reassure them that the offender’s wrongdoing is not theirs. You can promise not to punish the child for seeking help; do not promise that every detail will remain secret or that every outcome will be easy.
Ask only what is necessary for immediate safety and suitable help. Do not lead repeated questions, ask for descriptions of sexual acts, inspect a child’s body or confront an alleged abuser. Explain that you may need to involve people responsible for protection. Follow your setting’s actual safeguarding procedures and applicable law, using an independent route if a caregiver or leader is implicated.
Do not copy, download, screenshot or forward sexual images of minors as evidence. Do not ask a child to send them to you. Keep safe non-image identifying context only where appropriate, and seek official guidance about the device and existing material. Do not circulate the account to a group or prayer chain, or alter potential evidence on your own initiative while trying to tidy the situation.
Choose the response that fits
Unwanted or accidental exposure
Stop viewing, close or leave the material if possible, and seek a safe adult’s help. If closing is difficult, turn away and ask for assistance rather than continue looking. Unwanted exposure is not the same as deliberately choosing the material. Do not require the learner to prove that distinction by displaying it. Afterwards, consider a proportionate practical arrangement without promising that it prevents every encounter.
Once protection is in place, the lesson routes below can support a conversation about turning from harm, recognising pressure and receiving Christ’s help. No prior lesson is a condition of help.
Repeated intentional use or a settled habit
Tell the truth about chosen conduct without humiliation. Seek safe adult support, forgiveness in Christ and a realistic next step away from the harmful arrangement. Do not require a public confession or detailed account. A child needs adult care; an adult needs adult support. A spouse or child must not become the person’s detective, confessor or recovery manager.
Persistent difficulty controlling behaviour, serious distress or impairment calls for appropriately qualified assessment. Frequency, shame or calling oneself addicted is not a diagnosis. Pastoral help and professional care can serve different needs together; this guide is not a treatment programme. A pattern of intentional use does not rule out coercion or abuse, so remain attentive to protection.
Pressure, grooming, threats or exploitation
Prioritise protection. Stop engagement where safely possible, do not pay or supply more money or intimate material, and seek safe adult and appropriate official help. This follows the eSafety Commissioner’s published sexual-extortion guidance; its Australian reporting services are not South African authorities. A claimed or fabricated image can still be used as a threat. You do not need to establish its authenticity before asking for help.
Do not retaliate, bargain, investigate, contact the alleged offender or promise that blocking removes every risk. Someone who could not escape or who already complied still needs care. Use the emergency and child-protection routes above as appropriate and follow applicable reporting duties. Later lessons support understanding; they are not the protection response itself.
South African adults: reporting responsibilities
Selected statutory guidance: section 54 of the amended Sexual Offences Act requires immediate reporting to police of knowledge, reasonable belief or suspicion of a sexual offence against a vulnerable person defined in section 40, including a child. Section 110 of the Children’s Act separately requires designated reporters, including teachers and ministers of religion, who reasonably conclude specified abuse or deliberate neglect, to report in the prescribed form to a designated child-protection organisation, provincial social development department or police official.
These selected provisions have different thresholds and recipients; they are not a complete account of every applicable duty. Seek competent guidance about an actual case without delaying urgent protection or a required report. Do not use a blanket statement about every under-eighteen photograph, a threat of prosecution or a private forgiveness process to silence a child.
Mercy and care belong together
God made people with dignity. Sin is serious, and Jesus Christ died for sinners and rose again. Forgiveness and new life are received through repentance and faith, not earned through an unblemished past. Chosen wrongdoing can be brought truthfully for mercy and change. A harmed person does not need to confess somebody else’s sin as their own.
Forgiveness does not erase reporting duties, give an offender access or require immediate trust, reconciliation or resumed intimacy. A betrayed or abused adult needs truthful support and may need independent professional care. A group should not attempt to mediate an unsafe relationship or press for a testimony. Read Genesis 1:26–31, 1 Corinthians 15:1–4 and Hebrews 4:14–16 for the dignity, gospel and help that underlie this care.
Where the lessons can help next
- Unwanted material: Flee: what to do in the moment; When you are sent it, asked for it or shown it; Temptation is not sin.
- Repeated chosen conduct: Trustworthy people and help; Confession and the cleansing blood; Repentance; Wise habits, privacy and accountability.
- Threats or exploitation: Abuse, grooming and the God who sees; Sexual images, sextortion and the law. Obtain protection first.
- Foundations for a late entrant: Image-bearers with bodies and The gospel: Christ opens blind eyes.
Use these resources at a pace suited to the people involved. No lesson completion, recitation or disclosure is a condition of receiving help. The orientation explains the whole series; the earlier-childhood guide offers a short protective conversation.
Clinical terminology: Kraus and colleagues’ account of ICD-11 and the WHO diagnostic manual distinguish clinical assessment from moral distress alone. No diagnosis is made here. Service details and selected reporting provisions were checked on 16 October 2026; recheck current local arrangements when using them. Read biblical passages in your Bible.
Scripture quotations marked CSB have been taken from the Christian Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2017 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Christian Standard Bible® and CSB® are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers.